Anyone who has taken a class with Dr. Pamela Tracy, associate professor of communication studies, probably knows what I am referring to when I talk about a media confession. For those of you who do not know what it means, a media confession is a secret show, movie, artist or other media outlet that you love but would be embarrassed for people to know you love. For example, people's media confessions have been everything from a man knowing every word to a Justin Bieber song to a girl never missing an episode of "Jerry Springer." My newest media confession: I am obsessed with "Sister Wives" on TLC.
"Sister Wives" follows the life of a polygamist family. Kody Brown has four wives: Meri, Janelle, Christine and Robyn. Between the four wives, they have sixteen children with one on the way. The Brown family was living in Utah, but due to controversy, they moved to Las Vegas, Nevada where they felt their lifestyle might be more accepted. Only one of the wives has a legal marriage with Kody. The other three have spiritual unions. In Utah, they all lived together, but when they moved to Las Vegas, they split up. Each wife has a house for herself and her children, and Kody travels from home to home.
I am an avid fan of TLC programming, and I heard about Sister Wives on commercials but always wrinkled my nose at the idea of watching a show about "those people." The idea of a woman not only allowing but also wanting her husband to have sexual relationships with not just one but three other partners was bizarre. In addition to that, the idea each of these women actually wanted to build lives and families with the other women was too much for me to wrap my head around.
I found myself back at Longwood over spring break last year with an empty campus and a silent residence hall. I flipped through the TV channels and nothing looked good. "Sister Wives" was playing on TLC, simply for the sake of having the TV keep me company. I was hooked within ten minutes. Each couple, although not perfect, has found love and a way to make what society has found to be an untraditional lifestyle work. The family is the kind of family many people want: loud and connected and funny and full of compassion. Sure, they fight. But stepping back and looking at them you would realize that they really are not that different from the life rest of us grew up in. Yes, there are four wives, but it is also parents loving and providing for their children —a basic concept.
I judged the Brown family without even knowing them. Now, after being glued to the television set and following the family on their ups and downs, I feel like I know them. Maybe not on a personal level, but I have watched them jump hurdles and grow individually and as a family.
Last week, there was a very interesting episode in which Kody and his family went to visit his high school classmates. One classmate was very vocal in his disappointment in Kody's lifestyle and his anger at the possibility that Kody might pull other people into the faith.
The thing about the guy's argument is that it was completely misguided and hypocritical. The individuals were of the Catholic faith, and he often shared his beliefs and experiences through the Catholic Church with other individuals. A third friend asked why it was okay for him to talk about his faith but Kody could not talk about his. He replied that Kody might use the Catholic faith and the lessons the guy learned as a kid and twist them to confuse and brainwash him into believing in polygamy. As one of the sister wives pointed out, if you could get confused enough about your own beliefs that you could end up believing something else, there is another issue there and you must not be that strong in your faith.
I often like to read threads about "Sister Wives," and it's gotten to the point where I am no longer shocked at the things some people say. People, as we all know, are as mean as humanly possible when they hide behind a computer screen (which is absolutely pathetic, by the way) and they will whip out any ugly statement they can think of to bring someone else down. The Brown family stands there and takes it, and although they acknowledge how difficult it can be, they remain true to themselves and their faith. They want people to have an opportunity to learn about their lifestyle and why they chose to live the way that they live.
One of the freedoms granted to Americans is the freedom of religion. We have the right to follow whatever faith we want to follow, reject following a faith if we want to, not be sure where our faith lies or simply not be interested in making a decision either way. As much as someone might not agree with the Brown's faith, they have just as much of a right to follow their faith of Fundamentalist Mormon as much as anyone else has a right to call themselves Christian, Catholic, Jewish, Buddhist, Atheist or whatever religious view they chose.
I am sure a lot of people lash out at the Brown family because they do not understand their lifestyle. We as human beings tend to fear the unknown. The bizarre thing to me is that whether or not Kody Brown has multiple wives has no bearing on your life. People live different lives. Get over it. If you do not want to be in a polygamist marriage, then don't marry more than one person. It seems like a simple enough solution. Kody's catch phrase is "love should be multiplied, not divided" and while I do not follow that faith belief, if it makes Kody and his wives happy, comfortable and sound, then let them carry on with the love multiplying.
