Dear Pop-Tarts,
Your presence is everywhere: in my backpack, in the vending machines and in my dorm room. On multiple occasions you have been my only meal. Most often, Pop-Tarts, you are my breakfast on the run. I rarely, in fact I have never, had the time to enjoy you placed into the toaster like the commercials tell me to do. I feel that I am doing your animated friends a favor by eating you instead of having to dislodge you from my toaster.
Oh, Pop-Tarts, your gooey insides are grand. Your clever packaging shows images of familiar foods, but I have a suspicious feeling a whole birthday cake is not stuffed into one of your pastry casings. On some occasions, you have fooled me with your labeling and I have returned home with disappointment to find I left your tastier brothers at the store and instead purchased ones without frosting. When I am in need of literature, I can just open my Pop-Tart box and look at your shiny foil. Your endless puns never cease to amaze me.
Pop-Tarts, I love you. Your crumbly pastry crust always leaves my lap covered in its dust. I think the squirrels around campus follow me when I walk, knowing I’ll drop at least half of one of the only two pastries in the package. If I am consuming your crumbly goodness at home, I can guarantee you will forever remain in my heart, and in my couch cushions. I know to mentally prepare myself each time I peel open your foil, knowing a mess of crumbs are sure to rain down everywhere around me.
Sometimes I am brave, and stupid, enough to attempt to recreate you Pop-Tarts. In an attempt, your molten lava filling always spews forth and becomes an immovable casing on my baking sheet, and the bottom of my oven. Don’t get me started on trying to decorate them like your friend, Nyan Cat.
Your limited edition and new creative flavors, never cease to amaze me. I don’t think I could have imagined putting red velvet cake into one of your small casings but you surpassed my expectations. As if you hadn’t already broken out of the creative box, now I hear you’re even printing snowmen on your icing? My mind is blown.
Pop-Tarts, I love you. You make my mornings easier with your convenience and supremely sugary flavors.
Hugs and kisses,
Hungry college students everywhere
